Coming Clean
by yourapunk
Summary: Nick and Jess talk after the events of 2x21, one shot but possible multi chap.


**A collaboration fic with my friend Jenny! May make a few chapters of Schmidt, Cece and Winston finding out**

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His head hit the door with a resounding thump as he brought his hands to his face letting out a frustrated sigh. What the hell had he gotten himself into? He had everything planned out for tonight and then it just all fell apart, he thought tonight would be the night they finally took that step forward, but was that what she wanted, instead of figuring out if she did, tonight had left him more confused than ever.

She was an enigma, one moment he was sure they were just friends and the next she initiated the date, but now, now it was like she was determined to ignore this, whatever this was between them. What was with these new middle school dance rules anyway? Could she really keep to that, he knew he couldn't, did she really want that because he could say confidentially that he really didn't.

He could admit that he had fallen for Jess to Tran and admit some feelings he had for the her to Schmidt and Winston, although it would be a cold day in June before he would admit to either of them how deep his feelings for jess were, so then why couldn't he just tell the girl in question how he felt and what he actually wanted?

Letting out another sigh he dropped his hands from his face as he sunk to the floor resting his arms on his knees. Why was it so hard? All he had to do was say one little sentence, one sentence maybe two, and this could all end the way he hoped, but at the same time it could cause everything to fall to pieces, tiny unfixable pieces.

It would be so easy to get up and walk out of his room and across the hall to where everything he wanted was now probably sleeping. To just knock on the door and say what he wanted to say, what he wanted to say earlier today and has been wanting to say for a good long while now. It would be so easy but it all boiled down to one thing. He didn't know what she felt.

Jess leant against her door. She had told CeCe earlier today that she wanted Nick to tell her how he felt and after trying again twice tonight to get some kind of indication from him she was about ready to give up on him ever telling her. She knew Nick liked her or at least was attracted to her, their recent make out sessions had been an indicator to that, but she didn't know how much he liked her. Judging by the way nick never gave her a straight answer it was going to be a while before she found out.

She found it so hard to keep her thoughts straight when he looked at the way he had before she entered her room, parts of her felt scared of knowing how he felt. Yes he confused her making her doubt how deep his feelings were, but then he looked at her with one of his looks and her insides twisted in on themselves. That look scared her more than how she was feeling, because it was those looks that were making her keep going on with this. No one has looked at her like that before, but was that look enough? No, she needed to hear him say how he felt. Did he even know how he felt? how did she feel. Sure out of all the boys she was probably closest to Nick, she was attracted to him yes, but was there anything past the attraction. She was too scared to go there. She had a good thing going on right now. She had a job she liked, good friends and roommates she could actually stand. Any feelings past basic attraction for one Nick Miller she shouldn't have, couldn't have. Not when it could affect everything good in her life right now, her friends, her living situation. Was it really enough to put all of that on the line for simple attraction? Was it simple attraction? Did she usually feel this way when she simply found someone attractive? Taking a deep breath she began to analyse how she felt thinking about many factors. She'd had dirty dreams, very naughty dreams about him, that could be put down to just attraction though. Then there were times when her and nick would be flirting and there would just be this moment when she felt like forgetting any obstacles in their way and just kissing him senseless. It was starting to happen more frequently. It was now anytime they fought, flirted or were generally in the room together. Okay so that could also be classed as attraction, but besides the fact that she found Nick to be a good looking guy, a really good looking guy, there had to be some kind of feelings involved or else she wouldn't want to keep spending all her time with him and be so desperate to be in the same room as him right?

So attraction was one thing but if she was honest with herself she didn't just feel turned on around him, she felt completely aflutter. As cliché as it sounded he gave her butterflies. He could say something surprisingly sweet or simply touch her in a completely seemingly platonic way and her whole throat would close up and he heart would feel like it was jumping out of her chest. That was definitely more than just attraction right? The guy could kiss, Jess couldn't deny that, but it was more than the kissing and the butterflies. Nick was slowly turning into her best friend, besides CeCe. She hung out with him the most out of all the roommates and weather it was fighting or just hanging out Jess always had a good time with him. But it was even more then that,when she had found out Nick was sleeping with his boss, besides feeling betrayed, she also felt like she was loosing one of her best friends in the world.

Suddenly thinking about Shane made her want to sink into the ground and disappear her stomach tightened, jealousy, okay you don't feel this way about a woman, a guy you were just attracted to, hooked up with. A woman, who, was now completely out of the picture.

Her mind went towards Chicago and his dads funeral, how strongly she had felt the need to look after him and care for him, how his clear pain caused her pain. All she had wanted to do, all she could think about, was making it better for him.

Then there was tonight. Their date or was it dates? Okay so the start of the night hadn't been that good, but once Russell had come and they had high tailed it to the bar she actually started having a good time, and if she was only just attracted to the guy then why had she tried not once, not twice but thrice to find out his feelings for her. Why was she so nervous about his response? An 'oh my god what if he doesn't like me' kind of nervous if she was being completely honest with herself. Which lead her back to square one. How Nick Miller felt about her.

Yes back at square one, but now with a very slightly clearer idea of where she was at. Taking a breath her she put the salsa and chips on the floor and turned to face the door. She placed her hands palm down as she rested her forehead on the wood, taking a deep breath her hand moved to hover over the handle. Could she do this? Could she just walk across the hallway and ask him for the 4th time could, she had to figure out once and for all what this thing her and Nick had going on was. She owed it to herself and to Nick to at least try and get some kind of semi answer out of him. Even an 'I like you Jessica' would be a start in her books.

Gathering up whatever little courage which she had no idea was still in her, she stood up straight, opened her door and marched across the hall. Jess came to a halt a meter from his door before turning over her shoulder to look at her open one. No it was now, she had to do this. She took one more step and curled her hand up knocking once on the door before letting out a very broken  
"Nick"

Nick, who was still sitting on the floor leaning up against the door, his face in his hands, nearly jumped a mile in the air before he quickly scrambled up to open the door.

"Jess" Nick muttered as his eyes glanced from hers down to her lips and then back up.

Jess stayed silent before looking down at her boots and taking a deep breath, she looked back up at him before her eyes drifted to that damn white shirt he was wearing, eyes fixated on his tie she finally spoke.  
"Nick I can't... I need..." she swallowed. "What do you want us to be Nick?" She managed to say eyes tracing over the strips of his tie unable to look up at him out of fear. Nick stared at her, this was not what he was expecting her to say, actually in hindsight it should have been exactly what he would have expected her to say because really it felt like it's all she's been saying to him for the past 24 hours.

"Um... I... ah...well" Nick stutters, clearing his throat Nick tried again. "Jessica…"

"Nick." Jess said cutting off whatever Nick was about to say. "We need to sort this out. I need an answer. And I'm not leaving this spot until you give me one. Any kind of answer." She told him, clearly getting fed up with him dancing around the question every time.

Nick shuffled his feet slightly as he tugged at his tie loosening it even more, it wasn't even near his neck but it felt like it was strangling him.  
"I..." he cleared his throat, he could do this he knew exactly what he wanted he just had to tell her, he had to come out with it. She was asking him again, after however many times she already had asked today, he couldn't not answer her.

"I... I want to ... you've... you have taken over my mind Jess... you... you're all I can think about..." he stopped, thinking of a way he could really answer her question.

Jess looked at him in surprise and opened her mouth to say something but nothing came out. She cleared her throat and tried again, looking up into his eyes she lost all ability to speak as she stared up at him. Closing her eyes she took a deep breath and opened them again.

"Good answer Miller"

He looked at her shocked and nervous "I barely answered" he stammered looking at her surprised.  
"You have more to add?" She asked her heartbeat picking up suddenly, what had he had managed to say was enough to send her head spinning.

Sighing Nick ran a hand through his hair as he tried to settle his nerves. Suddenly aware of his surroundings he looked left and then right quickly before grabbing Jess by her arm and dragging her inside his room. Jess let out a small shriek of surprise as Nick closed his door

"I can't risk one of them fucking this up for us" he said, seeing her shocked expression he amended his statement "We can't discuss this out in the open with chances of Schmidt waking up"

"Schmidt?" Jess asked still partly in shock about being dragged into his room and partly confused as to why their roommate had been bought into the conversation.

"Look Jess this is not a conversation I want Winston and especially Schmidt to hear. I don't want them to hear about how I can't get you off my mind, or that every day I have to control the urge to kiss you or touch you or..." Nick tailed off as he realised what he had just said. Jess just stared at him as finally he punched in his man card and spoke again. "Jess it's been a long time since I've felt like this. To be honest I don't think I've ever have felt like this. I couldn't tell you before because I was scared of you not being on the same page. Actually I still am, I'm terrified Jess, of ruining our friendship, of me fucking this up and making it even more awkward..."

Jess by now was just staring at Nick in shock, her eyes wide open and her lips slight apart. Nick decided that since he had come this far he may as well bring it home.

"Jess, do you remember Schmidt talking about the no nail oath? I signed it because from the moment I met you I knew there was something special about you. There had to be something special about you if Schmidt, Coach and I all agreed to have you as a roommate. I signed the no nail oath not because I didn't want to nail you Jess, but because I couldn't. Because you're my roommate and I couldn't nail you no matter how much I wanted too. And I want to Jess. But this is much more than the no nail oath. I think... No I know… I'm in falling in love with you Jessica."

Jess wasn't even sure if she was blinking her heart had jumped into her throat and she was quite sure if she looked down it would be lying on the floor at her feet. She stared at him for a moment longer as his eyes desperately searched hers for any clue as to what she was thinking. He suddenly felt sick, what the hell had he done, she really needed to say something and quick, he was having the sudden urge to run. Jess beat him to it though as she ran out of the room and down the hall. He stood still for a moment and then slowly made his way out of his room walking towards the lounge area with caution, coming to a halt at the metal curtain as he found her pacing in front of the sofa, hands over her mouth, and he swore he could see tears in her eyes, what the hell had he done?

'He's in love with me. Nick's in love with me. Nick Miller is in love with me.' was the only thing that seemed to be running through Jess's mind now as she paced back and forth. "He's in love with me…" Jess muttered. 'This is not happening.' she mumbled along as she kept up her pace. 'But he's nick.' Her mind answered. 'Isn't this what you wanted him to say?' "SHUT UP" Jess yelled as she threw a cushion effectively breaking a vase. This caused Nick to jump in the air, and Schmidt to come running out of his room with a baseball bat, looking left and right to find out the cause of the noise.

"Who's messing with my shit," he yelled wielding his bat before looking at the remains of the vase on scattered on the floor and looked up at Jess "That is genuine Venetian glass Jess, do you know how much I spent on that..."

"What just happened?" Jess asked Schmidt.

"Well clearly you just broke my Venetian glass vase and owe me like 300 bucks?" Schmidt said haughtily and looked at her. "You are cleaning that up right?"

"Schmidt leave NOW" Nick finally spoke stepping into the lounge not looking pleased.

"She broke my vase, Cassonova disaster" Schmidt said tucking the bat under his arm.

"Oh god." Jess murmured looking at the floor.

"Fine, fine, yeesh. What did I say?" Schmidt said gesturing between them "Blowing up" he made an explosion motion with his hands before going back his room, not before throwing them a last diapproving glance.

The tension in the room suddenly became unbearable. "Schmidt is just being Schmidt." Nick said attempting to make some kind of conversation.

"No it's my fault I broke his vase, everything's just been my fault tonight." Jess said as she started trying to find the broom.

"Jessica this is not your fault."

"Actually Nick it is...I told Russell how we were having a great date, I made you tell me what we were, I murdered Schmidt's vase. Tell me Nick what hasn't been my fault tonight?" Nick placed his hands on her shoulders stopping her from searching the damn thing.

"Jess, Jessica look at me, I'm the one who started this whole thing I asked you out tonight in the dumbest way possible, and chickened out on confirming it was a date when you asked" He looked her in the eye unsure if he was waiting for a response or trying to make sure she grasped his point. "Ok Jess hears a thought. Tonight, never happened." Nick said trying to calm the brunette down, Jess just looked at him questioningly. "We never went out on any dates I never said I loved you. Everything you have heard could be the truth, but would it help if we pretend like nothing happened?"

Jess stared at him "No" she said firmly

"No?" He asked looking at her confused.

"Look parts of tonight were not the best. But honestly in between the awkward first date and arguing over what we wrote about on the paper I actually had fun." Nick just let out a snort in disbelief. "Fine - You wanna know what I wrote down when Russell asked me what this is? I wrote down that I wasn't sure but I liked spending time with you and wanted another date… don't believe me ring him up tomorrow morning and ask him yourself." Jess challenged Nick.

So there it was he was defiantly further into this then her but she wanted it too, He nodded not moving his hands from her shoulder but his thumbs began to move up and down slowly as he thought.

"I want to give us a chance Nick" Jess said calmly making sure she held eye contact.

"What you've said tonight makes it clear I don't know where I am as much as you do but I really want to find out, I know there's something special here and I can't just forget it and live life like we were before,I can't" Nick held his breath looking at her in amazement. "Nick, can we give this a shot?"

"Are you seriously asking me this?" Nick asked Jess who just nodded. "Jess I just said I was in love with you and you want to know if we can give this a shot." Again Jess just nodded. "Yes." He said

"Well now that we've sorted that out I'm going to bed." Jess said as she left, clearly ignoring the vase on the floor and started off down the hallway.

"You coming?" Jess asked as she turned around to face Nick.

"Right on." Nick exclaimed as he raced after the brunette.

"To your own room tonight Miller, I was planning to sleep." Jess said with a small smile. The two of them looked at each other for a few moments, when Jess' eyes dropped to his lips quickly, Nick took advantage of the moment placing a small chaste kiss on her lips before stepping back watching her carefully.

"Night Miller" Jess said a large smile on her face as she entered her own room.

"Night Day." Nick said a beaming as he turned around and went to his room to get some much needed sleep.


End file.
